Sunday, February 7, 2010

SIX Months...already.

It’s already been six months since August 7, 2009. What a perfect day that was! On our wedding day I was so in love, so grateful for Tyler and so excited for our future together. Now, only 6 months later, I can’t even describe how more in love I am, how more grateful I am to have Tyler by my side and how more excited I am to see what the future holds for us…together, forever!

In Relief Society today the lesson was on the Priesthood. When I was single I kind of hated those lessons. When the teacher would talk about how great it is to have the priesthood in your home, how wonderful it is to have a husband who worthily holds and sustains his priesthood, a father of your children who is able to bless you and the children, etc. My own father is a worthy priesthood holder, but it’s been years since I have lived at home. So, it would tear at my heart a bit and I would wonder if I would ever have that – the priesthood in my home.

Today during this lesson my heart swelled with gratitude that I have finally (FINALLY!) been blessed with a loving husband who wants nothing more than to make sure our home is filled with the Spirit. He daily strives to live the gospel – to be worthy of the great blessing and responsibility of being a priesthood holder. And so now I know, for myself, how wonderful it is to have a husband who is a worthy priesthood holder. So blessed!

But at the same time, empathy filled my heart for those friends who are in the same place I was just a few months ago. Single. The ache of a broken heart, the sorrow of yet-to-be fulfilled dreams and the pain of blessings that seemed to elude me are still present. I haven’t forgotten the way it felt to want something so badly. I haven’t forgotten how frustrated I would get thinking about what I had learned in Young Women’s and how my life was not really turning out the way those YW leaders had described.

But, to myself and my friends that are still single, I can’t stress enough how blessed we all are! We have a loving Father in Heaven who is very much aware of us – individually. He loves us and wants nothing more than to bless us with the things we stand in need of. The thing is, He knows what we need more than we do. It took me a long time to figure that out, and even still I sometimes forget and try to tell Him what I need. I can be a bit stubborn sometimes – just ask Tyler (and my parents.)

I am so happy that I had so many years to learn, to grow and to realize who I am. I was definitely not shorted on time to figure out how to be independent and really get to know myself. I was afforded the opportunity to complete my education, travel with friends, enjoy different places of employment, go to the temple because I was ready – not because I was going on a mission or getting married, purchase my own home, go to concerts galore, date more men than I care to admit – and even more blind-dates than that, build relationships with my nieces and nephews that I cherish and strengthen my testimony in a family ward when I all-too-soon (it seemed) “graduated” from the singles ward.

For all of these reasons, and many more, I now am very grateful to have been “older” when I got married. And, suddenly, I see how those years of being single were so important for me. That road I was traveling, which seemed so broken at times, led me straight to Tyler. To my Father in Heaven I am grateful – for leading me, guiding me and walking beside me through my journey. Always.

And to Tyler…I love you. Thank you for being my husband, my best friend, my worthy priesthood holder. Thank you for being the one that I am so excited to wake up next to, because I just can’t get enough of you!